Tuesday Tidbit: Clue: This post is not about Christmas

I do want to get rich, 

but I never want to do 
what there is to do to get rich.

~Gertrude Stein

My scattered brain hardly knows where to start. I have so much to say and most times, the time it takes me to organize my thoughts discourages me from even typing up a post. Do you ever feel like that? Yeah, happens to me ALL.THE.TIME. That or I get bummed out by not posting more pictures. Truth is I am not a quick writer, these posts take me forever and pictures tack on just that much more time.

I spent some time listening to Gertrude Stein reading some of her own poetry, a great little poetry site called PoetryFoundation.org. It made me get all lofty thought and dreamy about how I'd like to live. Not because of what she was reading, but because of the kind of life she lead, it was very much her own. I can sometimes feel like I am on a hampster wheel called life. Wake up tired, go to work, come home tired, eat, repeat. I hate when I get into those ruts and I am obviously in one right now. So here is what my dream life looks like.... my husband calls it retirement.

A country house on a few acres. By country, I think more woods than plains. River and trails near by for me to hike, run and hubby to fish. The acreage is for the kids and dogs to have ample safe places to play. Near enough to a town big enough to have a social connection, but not invite too much traffic. I want to wake up lazily, eat, read, exercise, nap, write, eat and sleep. There must be a fire place. What do I want to write? I envision myself blogging more about what, who knows? I want to write short stories, light poetry and opinion columns about work, life and parenting. Notice how there is not job mentioned in this fantasy LOL I want all of these things, but it requires work and I don't really feel like it LOL The same can be said for my fitness goals, can I just have what I want without working for it.

So since this isn't going to happen any time soon, here is what is really happening in my life. I have three books I am reading ...or at least have cracked, but not finished:

• Let's Pretend This Never Happened, J. Lawson
• Gone Girl, G. Flynn
• The Right Questions, D. Ford (compliments of my friend and the existential phase she is going through)

Fit, Fat, Fabulous, Faker??? All of the above:

• I have some weight to lose. I would like to say 15 lbs, but it could be more it could be less.
• I want to fit into my 10's or at least be able to sit without my belly rolling into multiple rolls
• I want to ditch the funky aches and pains that come with too much weight on my bones
• A funny term I hadn't heard in awhile came up and sadly I totally fit this category right now, "Caterpillar" it is when you have so many rolls, like the bra roll, the muffin top and saddle bags etc. that you look like a caterpilliar.
• I signed up for a half marathon in March, so need some miles on these legs.
• A couple weeks ago I slowed down my fast food in take, didn't quit all together, but it's a start
• I started drinking more water and up'ing my fiber intake
• I started taking my fitness classes again and seeing my trainer
• I am coaching jr. high girls basketball. This is where I feel like a fake, we should totally be undefeated, but we are 2-4 I think. Ugh!

Right now the goal is just to get comfortable with putting forth an effort. After spending the year being fairly lazy, starting from scratch is tough. Sure I could jump into a regiment, severely restrict my normal eating habits and get super fit in a matter of weeks. I know I can do that. I know that after a few weeks I would quit. I need to pace myself, I need being fit to feel like a natural part of my routine. I will introduce some jump start activities, but one at a time.

So for as much as I wanted to say, this is kind of it.

I am going to try to blog more, same story I know.
I am going to try and eat better, same story I know.
I am going to try and run more, same story I know.
NEW* I am going to try and read or listen to a poem a day. A quick haiku or a multiple page poem --whatever-- my brain needs some creative stimulation and I like poetry. I got all ambitious and thought I'd post everyday what I read, but I know I am a slacker. Every now and again, I may tweet what I read, but I am not committing to more than that.

Why I Kick A$$: I am doing something, not Earth shattering efforts, but something.
The Big Picture: I may ditch this segment as it's the same sh&$ every time, take it slow, one day at a time, a bad day is just a day, in the long run its about how it plays out, blah, blah, blah
Thankful Three:

1. Afghani Bolani's from Costco, delicious
2. Tamales, Tamales, Tamales... I have an insatiable hunger for my mother's tamales
3. For the Jillian Michaels' Podcasts, I am slow on the uptake, just found them, I don't really like her on Biggest Loser, but I dig her podcasts as background noise when I just hanging out